Thursday, 26 May 2016

Is Social Media FAKE?


I was getting ready to head to my friend's birthday party the other day and I took part in a chat about social media. I didn't think it would be thought-provoking initially, but as I was waxing I couldn't help but wonder "Am I real online? This is me right now - sweaty cause I hate waxing, my room is a mess and my nail polish has chipped. I certainly ain't sharing a photo of this precise moment so does that make me ... fake?". Hmm. 

The answer to that question is NO. I am real. Social media is part of my daily life, not just because of my blog but in general. I always liked sharing photos and I will admit I was one of those teenagers who would go home and complain about a boring teacher on my Facebook page when I was 13. *face palm* Timehop kills me each time an old memory resurfaces but it's funny to see how things changed. Whilst now I like sharing photos of my outfits or snaps of my latest purchases, it doesn't mean that what you see in those images is everything that happens in a day. My life doesn't revolve around shopping but IT IS part of it. 

Social media doesn't have to be fake at all. If you want to make a complete different image for yourself, a different person online,  then cool, you do that mate, but to me seeing a slightly more polished version of someone on instagram doesn't scream 'unreal'. There's people who like to share their birth on YouTube and that's great but that person would never be me. I guess we could say that it's a personal view what we all consider to be 'real' or not when it comes to sharing your life online however there's a couple of things I wanted to get off my chest. 



Just because it's good, it doesn't mean it's not real

For the past year especially I see that many people are quick to judge others on the content they share, labelling it as 'fake' if all you get to see if pretty flatlays of expensive makeup, designer bags, new shoes, flowers and your perfect manicure. Whilst I can see why it's all too ~perfect~, that photo taken in that moment is exactly what's happening, if that person chooses to share it and caption it in a certain way. I may not know that on the way to get your mani you slipped and fell and lost your keys but it's YOUR choice not to say that. Fact is, I see your nice nails and I'm loving them so I'll double tap it and move on. Just because someone decides to tell parts of a story it doesn't make them fake. 

Everyone's reality is different 

Whilst I may not be able to afford a Hermes or Chanel bag, I love following women who own these pieces because there's no harm in looking, right? If anything, I get inspired to work and one day achieve something. Just because it's not my reality, it doesn't mean it's unreal for literally everyone. I know that many teenagers and younger people in general may get the wrong impression about what the world is like if they follow people who live the Manhattan's Upper East side lifestyle (can you tell I've been re-watching Gossip Girl?). However, who are we to judge what's real or not, especially when we don't know the person on the other side? We need to get over the fact that some people are rich or are paid better. End of. I can't stop eye-rolling when I see bitter women calling others 'not relatable' because they decide to show their lifestyle. Just do you and focus on yourself. 

People share what's they're comfortable with

Just because you don't see me post selfies on the toilet it doesn't mean I'm not relatable. I am the first to tell people that I share quite little of my personal life online. Just because I like talking about makeup and fashion on here, it doesn't mean that these two topics are the only things I care about. I just know that whatever you put online stays there, so I prefer to present certain things but others just keep to myself. For example I may have been extremely stressed out the past few months before my final major project submission, but just because I didn't moan about it in every single blog post I don't think it makes me fake. I mean, who cares about it anyway? YES, I'm nosey and I like seeing what youtubers and bloggers reveal about their past or their challenges but I respect the limits and people online really don't owe you anything. As a reader of many blogs I don't expect the blogger to share the details of her relationship or the fight she had with her best friend. If she wants to, cool, otherwise I'm more than happy to read about her latest lip balm addiction. 

Most of us wear a filter in real life

Some may disagree but even in real life, with long term friends or family we filter out some bits. No one likes going around telling everyone their problems especially since it's hard to trust people. You may not realise it, but you certainly wear your own kind of filter sometimes. Just the other day I was going to meet up with a friend for drinks and I love her to bits but I really REALLY wasn't in the mood as I've had a long week. I don't like cancelling though so I slapped on a smile and two shots later we were laughing out loud and I was glad I gathered the energy to go out. People always tell me I look happy and with no worries at all as I crack jokes and sing with my gal-pals but truth is, I just decide to have a positive attitude around people and only crack if I'm in real trouble or surrounded with the closest people around me who can tell something's wrong. Other than that, just because Kristina is always happy, it doesn't mean she's faking it. I decide to be happy and then if I have stuff to deal with on the side, I will. I never understood people who post rant statuses on Facebook or Twitter looking for attention to then say "Oh nothing" when people ask what's wrong. 


So basically after all this ramble my point was that social media is not fake, unless you want to make it that way. I'd love to know your thoughts though as I know this can be a little bit of a controversial topic! 


PS - In the photo I'm wearing this bomber. I'm obsessed with it. 


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20 comments

  1. I have a love / hate relationship with social media.

    Most times I rarely show my life on social media I just keep it to blogging or maybe the odd selfies but I'm not that too deep into it. I think it's up to people to use it how they see fit, end of the day it's their lives and if they feel that's their truth then so be it, they have to live with it.

    I do feel sorry for those who feel less than when they feel they can't obtain this 'standard' they feel needs to be upheld on some social media but if you're being honest to yourself, happy and you're not being malicious to others - carry on. You can't please everybody and someone is going to like you for what you are doing. xo

    LaaLaa | DOLCE VANITY

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  2. You make some really interesting points, and it does seem to be quite a controversial issue right now with the 'perfect white' and 'monochrome' themes that some people choose to have. My photos are as you find them, I might lighten them slightly but I don't spend hours editing them, I don't have the time x

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    1. I personally love themes and marble and all that but it's just up to personal preference :)

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  3. I loved this post and totally agree with everything said! In my mind instagram is about sharing those "perfect" moments as part of my blog and general life, purely because it's what I find interesting and other people! If we shared any old thing it wouldn't be as special and it's not fake to capture the "best" moments. Everyday we put on make-up because we enjoy it and I take that same concept into social media, it's about having fun and being creative. I would consider myself a perfectionist and do admit I like to get the best photo and make it as appealing as possible but again that's down to personal preference and like you I don't think I'd be one to share a video of myself giving birth or photos ha,ha! xx

    Jenny | Krystel Couture

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    1. LOVE your point about makeup, absolutely, you wanna show your best really! And about the giving birth part..hahah girl, hats off to the women that do but DAYM. I can't. xxx

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  4. I really like the saying, don't compare your every day to someone else's highlight real. How we present ourselves on social media is our best side - no one is going to instagram how they cried at work, or fought with their parents, or have food poisoning. I do think we have to be careful to not gloss over the realities of life too much, but no one wants to see the gritty details either - it's a hard balance, especially if you're making money from your social, or trying to be an influencer.

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    1. I agree, I guess glossing it too much may alienate you if you want to be an influencer but there's a nice and a public for everyone! x

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  5. Studies have shown that people really are "themselves" on social media, although there are always those people who give it a bad name by catfishing people or being really fake online! I especially like your point about filtering in real life because I definitely do that online and around people I know personally.

    www.beautyfromkatie.blogspot.com

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    1. Hahah catrfish is definitely giving social media a bad name but people do it in person as well to some extent and yeah, I mean who goes around sharing everything with everyone anyway?! xxx

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  6. I totally agree with this. Social media is fake if you want it too, just like real life. Everyone can pretend to be something in real life too and so the same happens in social media. x

    www.thelisasworld.com

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    1. Exactly! I make up names when I go to Starbucks haha xx

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  7. I definitely agree; just because you share a highlight reel so to speak, doesn't make it any less real! :)

    Jess xo | The Indigo Hours

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  8. I love reading these posts, I always feel like they're slightly controversial when in reality theyre really not! I really like how my Instagram is something I can look back on to see just one image of one perfect day but obviously it's completely different to my whole life. It's kind of like treating it as a photo album of your best bits! - Maria | BeautyMatters

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    1. Absolutely! I mean nobody would want to share an awful selfie haha and the first photos get thrown away from albums so yeah, I agree! xx

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  9. couldn't agree with this post more. people are quick to make judgements and assume people are being false online when all they're doing is posting the best of themselves, which i bet most of us tend to do anyway on a less extreme level. definitely a thought-provoking topic! x

    www.thedressdiaries.co.uk

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  10. Fab post Kristina! I think there's a line between being real and over sharing, which I don't like to cross! People are too judgemental to say others are being fake, just let them do them and you do you! X

    Everything But The Kitchen

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  11. This is definitely interesting.
    I think to an extent it is true, but only because people are striving for perfection and they want to show off their best sides. I would never post a picture with my make-up looking flaky or at the end of the day when it has just about fell off my face. Is that realistic? Not really.
    I think when it's a persona you only know from online, it's so easy to conjure that image of them in your head. Sometimes all it takes is to pass a blogger on the street to realise that hey,they are normal people and they scrunch their hair up and have lazy days too.

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  12. I wrote a post like this today and said pretty much all the things you said! Great minds and all that haha ;) I completely agree with you that we all wear a filter in every day life as well. Great post!

    Kelly // Velvet and Vibranium

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