Monday, 17 September 2018

Tinder and Finding Love


Let's be real, the days of old-school romance where you marry your high school crush are almost gone. Modern love is not what it used to be, as the dating game has seriously changed, especially in the last decade with the introduction of apps. Not quite the most romantic way of meeting, is it?

 The internet has revolutionised the way we look for love and therefore how we find it. Now we get to meet people we may have never spoken to otherwise. 

The first thing that springs to mind when you mention Tinder though, is a mix of cringe-worthy messages, misspelled "compliments", awkward dates, or meaningless hookups caused by boredom and alcohol combined with loneliness. It's hard to believe anyone has actually met an amazing partner on there, especially when most people around you have nothing but horror stories to share. Well, brace yourself as actually finding boyfriend material happens, more often than you think. 

 I'm proof of it, together with many other ladies who emailed me to share their successful Tinder stories. Yes, you read that right, it isn't a myth, and I wanted to take a little time to give a little credit to this app that, otherwise, gets a very bad reputation. (and no, this is not sponsored...! hah) 




When I went back on the single's market after years, I realised just how much of a jungle this whole dating-thing really was. One of my best pals became the Samantha to my Charlotte (Sex and The City fans whats up) and convinced me to get out there and most importantly out of my circle to meet new people. 

I was pretty reluctant at first. I still remember our conversation, drinking Coronas and talking about life; "Just give it a shot, it's full of weirdos, however, there are normal guys on there too. That's how I met my boyfriend. It's good if you want to kill some time and go on some dates regardless..you'll see where it takes you" and there I was, on the train headed home from London contemplating whether I should just give in and join the swipe-gang. Fuck it, let's see what the hype is all about. 

It's safe to say that a platform like Tinder favours girls in the sense that most of the chase and messaging has to be done by men at first, unless that's not your ball-game of course. I'll be honest here and say that the quality of the options we get is pretty poor (harsh but true), hence you need to learn to filter out the good ones from the bad ones. You laugh and avoid the creepy sexual jokes, and you definitely start being progressively more picky with who you talk to. The dull 'wyd' and 'hey' doesn't cut it, and you lean towards people who make a little more effort with their first message or generally their bio. 


Personally, I always avoided selfie-lovers posing topless, who were only showing pics of themselves on lads holidays/exclusively in clubs, however, this is down to personal taste! At the end of the day, you have to go for what's your cup of tea so if the nightclub life suits your style, you swipe right girl! 


Scanning through a wave of weird messages I remember seeing a casual "Oh I see you like The Great Frog jewellery! I like their stuff too" and boom, there I was, sending and receiving mini-essays talking about anything from music, dogs, fashion, holidays, what happened at work and it was just so easy to chat about anything every day. I wanted to know more about this person. He is funny, chilled out, has his own passions and hobbies, gets my sense of humor and he's also hot?! umm..all the boxes were ticked. 


Fast forward a few months later, and the mysterious man, named Ed, has earned the badge of boyfriend (little did he know what he was in for) and now, over a year later, favourite human and best friend. You know when you feel like you've known someone forever and they're just on your wavelength? He's the person I can always count on and I get excited speaking to every day. 


If you follow me on Insta you've probably seen him appear in more than a few boomerangs. Never in a million years did I think I would meet someone as weird as me who I can hiss with and do a chicken dance with any time, like it's the most normal thing in the world. How did it all start? Just a quick 'swipe'. Yes, it's not the most romantic but isn't the most important part the end result and everything in between? I definitely think we put too much pressure and thought on how others will perceive the way you and your partner first started talking, especially with the older generation. 

There's still a bit of a stigma around relationships born online. People don't think they're 'real' and that they won't last. I received a few emails about this matter and Lisa B. was one of the ladies who did admit most of her friends and her family didn't quite take her relationship seriously when it started, all because of Tinder's reputation. " I'm in my early 30s and I did get some funny looks when I said I was on the app. When my husband and I first started talking I didn't think it would go anywhere but before we knew it, we were spending every weekend together and moving in together was on the cards. It took my family some time to 'get it' but now they don't question how serious we are..I mean..we're married!". 


Alissa N. from Machester says "When I joined Tinder I was just looking for some free drinks and maybe some fun as I was a little lonely however I very quickly caught feelings for this guy and we just moved in together a couple of months ago!" and finally Tash from Leeds says:" I went on a couple of horrendous dates and was just tempted to delete the app as it was bringing me more grief than fun. I logged in to delete it and started talking to this guy instead. A week later we met up and now we're married with a kid."


I've recieved many emails and these are just literally a couple of my favourites. 


Online dating isn't for everyone and if you want to stick to the classic 'being approached at a cafe/club/train station' then that's completely fair, however if some of you are currently sat on your sofa reading this and thinking 'meh I suppose I COULD give it another go..' then do it! You never know who the next swipe could bring into your life. 






Shout Out to Ed for being totally awesome and modeling matching leopard with me.
Check out his band: Pirates of Panama






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17 comments

  1. I prefer online dating as you can easily search through people

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  2. Aw lovely story and lovely couple I am all for people finding love online as saves time digging out the diamonds

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  3. Absolutely loved reading this post Kristina, and these photos are amazing too!! You are one good looking couple you two ;) No but in all honesty, I've given Tinder a go a few times myself and although it has never led anything for me, pretty much all of my friends have had long relationships starting on Tinder! I think these days it shouldn't really matter where you first find your partner/other half/whatever you want to call it, the most important thing is that you found him/her and are happy ♥︎ xx

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  4. I met my husband at work in the times before the internet barely existed - I couldn't imagine dating on an app

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  5. Great photos, so tasteful but cool at the same time. Hate too sloppy couple photos. I have no experience with online dating, but I think it's such a fab way to meet new people.

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  6. I found my long term current boyfriend on Tinder, I definitely don't think it's given the credit it deserves!

    Jodie // jodieloue.com

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  7. The world has changed so much since I was dating. Some of my friends date online but I don't think they've had much luck so far.

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  8. My mummy couldn't imagine the minefield of meeting people through a dating app, she did it the old fashioned way - down the pub ;) Tinder scares her!

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  9. Angela Ricardo Bethea19 September 2018 at 21:45

    You both had a great and stylish look, and that is such a lovely love story. Thanks for sharing.

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  10. Great Job, your Blog has nice content Too short but Very well define and much effective.

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  11. Really enjoyed reading this blog post babe, thank you so much for sharing. Your post was really well-written, I adore that online dating has worked for you and wish you all the best 🌸✨

    With love, Alisha Valerie x | AlishaValerie.com

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  12. This is such a great post and its lovely to hear online dating success stories especially tinder ones. You guys look great together and I loved the matching outfits.

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